What Did Columbus Actually Say When Approaching Pittsburgh?

“Paisanos! We are in waters I ain’t seen in a long time!”

Now, I am a student of history, and I’m pretty sure Chris never navigated the Allegheny, Monongahela and Ohio, but if he woulda, that, like many Wolfpackers, is what he’d have said. Trust me. Pretty sure he warned pilots about rocks along the way, too. “Awhhh…funculo! There goes the Santa Maria. Minchia!”

Road games are like the stuff Christibol went through. Ripe with unfamiliarity, angst at not really knowing the lay of the land and the disposition of the natives. This Pack crew knows absolutely nothing about the Panthers. Never encountered them, never seen ’em in their habitat, ‘cept for some Marlin Perkins films.

“Jim! Are you aware that these Panther Sophomores are the #30 ranked recruiting class?”

“Yes, Marlin. They are young and wirey, and not yet wise in their ways. Their Alpha padded on off to Buffalo.”

“Yeah, Jim. They also have this trainer called Narduzzi. Like handlers before him, he has that panther instinct to orchestrate kills on inattentive prey, no matter the current state of the pride.”

“Yep. Marlin? Hey wait. Have we ever seen a pride of panthers? I don’t think so. Those cats are sneaky enough on their own. Did you know that Columbus returned with only two ships?”

” Sure, Jim. What the hell does Columbus have to do with panthers?”

“Nothing, really, Marlin. Wanna discuss Captain Cook and Hawaiians? I got some film of that. Poor devil got cocky and lost more than a ship.”

About TheCOWDOG

Multiple ACC Championship ring bearer...If they had given us rings back then, that is. Famous for being Lou Holtz's favorite target...of flying clipboards, and responsible for the creation of wholey new obscenities off the tongue of Sam Esposito, between and outside the white lines. Son of a HoF basketball coach.

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Home Forums What Did Columbus Actually Say When Approaching Pittsburgh?

Viewing 25 posts - 51 through 75 (of 188 total)
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  • #125135
    bill.onthebeach
    Participant

    F^CK!!!

    #NCSU-North Carolina's #1 FOOTBALL school!
    #125136
    Texpack
    Participant

    Terrible call

    #125137
    Fastback68
    Participant

    Not a push off or pick. Clemson ran a pick for 7 last week. No call

    #125138
    Texpack
    Participant

    What’s more stressful ninth inning of a playoff baseball game or a two minute wait for a State FG attempt?

    #125139
    Texpack
    Participant

    Holy Cats I could kick left footed better than that

    #125140
    bill.onthebeach
    Participant

    HALFTIME…

    Smoke if you got ’em…

    TIE ball game…

    On to the locker room…

    GO PACK!!!

    #NCSU-North Carolina's #1 FOOTBALL school!
    #125141
    TheAliasTroll
    Participant

    That looked like me trying to kick a field goal in latest Madden video game..

    WOW what a miss

    #125142
    Fastback68
    Participant

    A straight ahead kicker would at least be in the same zip code.

    #125143
    ancsu87
    Participant

    F the NCAA and ACC. Yesterday was no coincidence and today ACC refs f us again. We need to tell Swafford and UNC to f off as we will not pay them again. Disgusting BS

    #125144
    Texpack
    Participant

    The OPI was huge. The DB initiated the contact

    #125145
    rthomas44
    Participant

    That FG kick was an embarrassment to all college football.

    #125146
    packalum44
    Participant

    Cons: Dropped interception. Dropped catches. Poor throws by Finley. Refs stole 4 points (the missed FG is on Dave for selecting a FG kicker worse than we had last year…how is that even possible?)

    Pros: Okay defense (consider how many processions Pitt had). Pitt handed us 14 points.

    Pitt fans should be more aggrieved than ours b/c they outplayed us. Hines combined with poor tackling by Pitt keeps it tied.

    We are not good enough to play poorly and beat ACC teams.

    #125147
    Wolfanatic
    Participant

    There was no OPI. Total BS. We better wake up and realize that Pitt ain’t about to roll over. Motivation time. A potentially great season is slipping away if we don’t pick it up on both sides of the ball.

    #125148
    TheAliasTroll
    Participant

    Just let legendary Chub$z out there to kick the damn field goals.

    #125149
    TheAliasTroll
    Participant

    I don’t think we can afford another flat lined 3rd quarter. Dave better be lighting these guys HINEYs on fire in the locker room.

    #125150

    Our “being ranked” collapse comes a week late?
    DAMN, what a stinking pile the first half was. God Bless Hines; he’s the only one who’s showed up so far.
    Crap! Sh!tty tackling, Gosh awful receiving. Usual pass (no) defense!

    Please, please, please, can we have a different Wolfpack team on the field for the 2nd half? The one out there for the 1st half was putrid!

    Go Pack?

    Oh, they block in the back right into the camera on their first touchdown with no call; then the patently awful ACC officials make up a call against us on our touchdown. Screw the ACC office of Officiating. Always Awful!!

    #125151
    Texpack
    Participant

    The TD drive to end the half was encouraging. I just hope the defense isn’t so gassed that they can’t get off the field in the second half.

    #125152
    packalum44
    Participant

    You can almost make the case….ALMOST….that we should never ever ever kick FGs. Even in a hail mary situation like we just had. It was the right call by Dave but only b/c of the circumstances. It was about the same distance to beat Clemson last year. Missed FGs WILL LIKELY cost us a game this year. I hope not this game. Hopefully it will be against the Irish.

    #125153
    SaccoV
    Participant

    I began listening near the end of the first quarter, and Tony Haynes mentioned on the radio that holding was NOT going to be called today. I’ve noticed that on EVERY stretch play Pitt has run, their blockers have handfuls of State jerseys between the numbers. The ‘pick’ play call was the worst I’ve seen. Holy schamoly. Defense needs to get a turnover.

    #125154
    TheCOWDOG
    Moderator

    “Marlin? Marlin?! Get your ass outta the truck right now! And bring the damn rifle!”

    #125155
    packalum44
    Participant

    Tackling was not AWFUL. Not great but the missed tackles are against an NFL back who has an effective stiff arm. Our boy J Sam has the best stiff around. We don’t lament those missed tackles…b/c they are not really missed when its J Same its just that we have a superior talent among mortals – am I right? So I’m not too upset that their talented back stiffed armed a few times. Defense is not the problem. Holding them to 14 points is not AWFUL considering their time and number of possessions. They scored 14 points in three quarters….kind of.

    #125156
    bill.onthebeach
    Participant

    Our DEFENSE starts the 2nd half with the INT !!!

    Stevens!!!

    GO PACK!!!

    #NCSU-North Carolina's #1 FOOTBALL school!
    #125157
    Texpack
    Participant

    Brutal holding not called but we get the pick anyway.

    #125158
    TheAliasTroll
    Participant

    Yeah defense making a play. Atta boy!!!! Atta boy!!!

    #125159
    Fastback68
    Participant

    It’s a pick. Did you catch the Pitt player dragging our guy to the ground from behind?

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