A lot of people talk about feeling stressed out at Christmas time. That’s too bad because if you can just relax a little and roll with the punches, it’s a great time of year. My wife on the other hand often complains (loud and long) about how much stuff has to be done and how little time there is left. I tell her to relax and enjoy the season. She tells me to shut up (among other things) and that she still has to buy the gifts for YOUR PARENTS.
Now I will admit that it is hard to buy gifts for two people who need absolutely nothing. They are not rich by any means (unless you count friends and family), but they are at the stage of life where all of the big bills have been paid…mortgages, college tuitions, etc. They have everything they need and have pretty much everything they want (except for having the grandchildren live closer). So, the issue of gifts was bound to come up again this Christmas, just like it has every year for the last 20+ years of “wedded bliss.�
However, this year was going to be different. In October, my sister-in-law calls my wife to plan a weekend here. Our kids get along great and we always have a lot of fun when we can get together. The wives will go shopping and the annual problem will be put to bed early this year. Oh, if things could only go according to the Master Plan at least once in a while.
First of all, I have to leave town on business at the end of the month. Now I am not talking about a white-collar business trip with airline food, Power Point presentations, and dinners on the company expense account. I’m talking about actual work…with tons of complicated, contrary equipment…shift work…and problems…lots and lots of problems. Engineers get “invitedâ€? on these little excursions for a variety of reasons, but mostly because of the problems.
But this is October and in blissful ignorance, the big weekend is planned for the middle of November…because surely I will be back by then. As the appointed time draws closer, I’m still out of town…because problems have come up and we ain’t done yet. The days drag on and things begin to look dim. Then the obvious solution appears…since the daughters-in-law do all of the real work anyway, the Master Plan will proceed as planned…just without me.
Mercifully, the problems at work are finally resolved and I leave South Carolina at 5:30 am Saturday morning (after working all night) and head home to Virginia. (When you live in a town serviced only by Puddle-Jumper Airways, it’s often quicker to drive home than to fly.) The Master Plan can still be salvaged with me involved in everything except for dinner Friday night and my daughter’s cheerleading competition Saturday morning. (Don’t ask…long, long story.)
I get home Saturday before lunch, say hello to everyone and go straight to bed. I wake up several hours later when my wife and daughter got home from the competition and they wake me up to tell me the good news…They came in second place!
I join my brother downstairs in the den to watch college football and quietly dread the coming trip to the mall with two women and four kids aged 5 to 14. My peaceful respite before the coming storm was rudely interrupted when the cable blinked and then went out during the Virginia-Georgia Tech game. Well with the cable out, another serious hitch is developing in the Master Plan….Mall, Dinner out with all the kids, and the State-BC game on ESPN. I could live without the first two…but I will not be denied my college football!
Buffalo Wild Wings just opened a new store here and by all accounts have been packed ever since they opened. I suggest that maybe we could go to dinner at BWW and at least see part of the game… but that there could be a long wait before getting a table for eight. My sister-in-law says that my brother and I should just go to BWW and eat together and the two women will take the kids to the mall and then to dinner. Can you believe it? (And you wouldn’t either if you had ever watched my sister-in-law and I “interactâ€?.) The Master Plan has just hit a high gear that I didn’t even know existed.
Before anyone can change their mind, my brother and I head out for BWW while the kids and the women head for the mall. I don’t understand exactly how all of this happened, but I am not stopping to look for answers. I’m a little worried about how many UVa fans might be at BWW, but hey it can only be so bad.
For a while, the new and improved Master Plan proceeds wonderfully. We wait about a half-hour for a booth 20 feet from the big screen where the State-BC game will be shown. We are not even too concerned when a women’s tennis match runs over into kick-off. (The color balance on the big screen is off, but what do you expect for a brand-new sports bar?) My son gets dropped off after supper and manages to find room for some left-over appetizers. By the third quarter, the happy ending to the big weekend is headed south, but no Master Plan is ever perfect.
So other than the pathetic ball game, the weekend turned out just great. The kids…well they were kids, but nothing (and no one) was broken, so it’s all good. My parents’ gifts were bought and everyone had a good time. So what did the wives decide to get for our parents who have:
– Been NC State fans for many decades;
– Four fantastic grandchildren; and
– Their only two kids graduated from NC State?
The answer is simple. Combine all of these things into one neat package:
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So, what do you think? I think that the wives had a great idea and know that my parents will be tickled to death.
Now for the rest of the story…while my brother and I were resting comfortably at BWW, our wives were tangling with the incompetents in the photography department of a department store. Evidently the purpose of an appointment is to set the time for the customer to arrive…which has absolutely nothing to do with when the pictures are actually going to be taken. Oh…and the photographer was an idiot who has no idea how to get a good picture from kids. Our wives had to arrange and pose the kids and get them all to smile at the same time.
Before all of the pictures could be satisfactorily finished, the five-year old got tired, hungry, cranky, and unmanageable. My sister-in-law packed up her two and said that she was going to have her pictures taken by someone with a clue. The picture of my nieces was done in NC the next week.
The entire set of full-size pictures will arrive home on Friday from two different directions. All of the pictures will be framed and given to my parents on Christmas Eve. So you see…there is absolutely no reason to get stressed out over Christmas. Everything always works out in the end. I’ll be back after the Holidays, so until then,
…Merry Christmas to all and to all a good night!
